What is my Purpose?

When you Google the word “purpose”, this is the definition that comes up:

The reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.

What is my purpose?

This is one of the questions you ask when you’re trying to find the meaning of life and your role in it.  I know what it was before.  When I was a young girl, my purpose was to listen to my parents, do well in school and practice piano.  As I grew older, it was to finish university, find a job, get married and have kids.  While I did get side-tracked for a couple of years and kicked around Europe, I pretty much stuck to the plan. As an adult, I got married, bought a home and had kids. My purpose then, was to pay down the mortgage, be a good mom and do my best at my job.

I think that I have mixed up purpose with other words like role, expectation, obligation.

I just read this article called How to Find Your Life Purpose: An Unconventional Approach. Leo talks about personal bubbles and how we need to break out from them. Bubbles are places where we are the centre of the universe, feel safe and comfortable. Leaving the bubble makes us uncomfortable. But when we do, we get a broader view of the world and the people in it. We acknowledge our shortfalls and learn new skills. We become bigger than ourselves.  And only then can we move beyond ourselves to a greater sense of purpose.

I agree with Leo.  I spent years unknowingly stuck firmly in my bubble.  Now that I have exited the hamster wheel and my kids have moved into adulthood,  it’s easier for me to see this.

But It’s been a Pretty Good Year

I have been trying to exit my bubble this year.  I have always told other people to put themselves out there.  Otherwise, luck, fortune or opportunity will not find them.  It’s good advice but I wasn’t good at following it myself.  I had “really” good excuses though.  Too busy, too tired, too stressed out – sound familiar?

As 2017 comes to a close, I am happy about what I’ve done this year.  Have there been any earth-shattering accomplishments?  Have I made a ton of money? Have I made a big list of objectives and checked them off one after the other?  Well, no.  But still, this retirement thing takes getting used to.  I never realized how hard it would be to break free of habits that I developed over 30 years at one company. Picking up new skills is more challenging than it used to be.  Being free and having too much choice is shockingly paralyzing. But at least now I am doing things versus thinking about them. So for me, positive steps forward indeed.

What I Really Came Here to Talk About

And oh, I did start out by talking about purpose.  My original intent for this blogpost was to talk about why I haven’t written anything in 8 months even though I had good intentions. Some of it is because I got busy doing other things.  But it’s more that I haven’t figured out what the purpose of this blog is.  I know I enjoy practicing my writing.  I like  that the blog is a vehicle to express things that I might otherwise bottle in. I enjoy the community of bloggers even though I’ve not participated much this year.  But like my life, I’ve not really determined what purpose this blog serves.

So many of the blogs I read have clear purpose and intent written by people who are experts in their field.  Or, they offer opinions on people/places/things. Or, they teach me to do things like cook or make DIY products. But I am no expert at getting older. I am not an academic or even a deep thinker. I am very practical at heart. I do have opinions. I dole out advice.  But my day-to-day life is not so exciting that I find a lot of subject matter to write about.

I am hoping that if I stay outside my bubble, I will find luck, fortune and opportunity. And then the true purpose of my blog and maybe even my life will drift my way.  I am going to try to document the small steps I am taking to see the bigger picture of where I am heading comes to me in a aha moment.  So expect to see me more frequently than every 8 months.  🙂